You Should Know

A guy comes in to buy an airline ticket from a travel agency. The travel agent starts filling out the ticket form.

 

 

Agent. “Okay, what’s your name?”

Customer. “G. Youshudknow.”

Agent. “Why?”

Customer. “Why what?”

Agent. “Why should I know?”

Customer (stares).

Agent. “Your name?”

Customer. “I told you, but you didn’t get it right.”

Agent. “What?”

Customer. “My name. It’s not Y. Shudiknow. It’s G. Youshudknow.”

Agent. “How can I?”

Customer. “What?”

Agent. “Know your name?”

Customer. “I just told you.”

Agent. “You did? How come I don’t know what it is?”

Customer. “I don’t know.”

Agent. “What is it?”

Customer. “What?”

Agent. “Your name?”

Customer. “It’s…G. Youshudknow.”

Agent. “Why should I?”

Customer. “What?”

Agent. “Know your name?”

Customer. “Because I told you.”

Agent. “No you didn’t. You said, I should know.”

Customer. “It’s not I. Shudknow. It’s G. Youshudknow.”

Agent (waving him away angrily). “Get out of here. Get out! You’re nuts.”

Later, another customer walks in.

Agent. “Okay, I’ll fill out this ticket for you. “What’s your name?”

Customer. “Hy Watfore.”

Agent (nodding) “Hi. Because I need to process your ticket. What’s your name?”

Customer. “Hy Watfore.”

Agent. “Are you gonna tell me your name?”

Customer. “I did.”

Agent. “You did?”

Customer. “Yes.”

Agent. “How could you have? I don’t know what it is.”

Customer. “What?”

Agent (shouting) “Your name.”

Customer. “Watfore.”

Agent. “Because I can’t do this without it.”

Customer. “What?”

Agent. “Process your ticket! What is it?”

Customer. “Hy.”

Agent. “I already said hi. What’s your last name?”

Customer. “Whatfore.”

Agent (screaming) “Get out of here. Get out! And don’t come back.”

Another customer walks in.

Agent. “I better not have any trouble with you.”

Customer (looks around uneasily) “Trouble?”

Agent. “What is your name?”

Customer. “Joe.”

Agent (breathes a sigh of relief). “Thank God! Okay. What’s your last name?”

Customer. “Canttell.”

Agent. “What?”

Customer. “Canttell.”

Agent. “Can’t tell what?”

Customer. “Just Canttell.”

Agent. “What is your name?”

Customer. “Joe Canttell.”

Agent (rubbing his forehead). “Joe. Why do you refer to yourself in the third person, Joe can’t do this, Joe can’t do that, and then tell me you can’t tell me your last name?”

Customer. “I did.”

Agent. “What?”

Customer. “Told you. It’s Joe.”

Agent. “I know. What’s your last name?”

Customer. “Canttell.”

Agent. “Why not?”

Customer. “Why not what?”

Agent (crying). “Why can’t you tell me your last name?”

Customer. “I did.”

Agent. “No you didn’t. You said you can’t tell.”

Customer. “It’s not U. Canttell. It’s J. Canttell.”

Agent. “Who’s Jay?”

Customer. “I am.”

Agent. “You said your name was Joe.”

Customer.”It is.”

Agent. “What’s your last name?”

Customer. “Canttell.”

Agent. “Why not?”

Customer. “Why not what?”

The agent chases the customer out into the street and hits him several times. The agent is arrested and taken to jail. A policeman is in the office taking evidence from a woman co-worker of the agent.

“Okay ma’am, that will be enough for now. Let me get your name for the record.”

“Ida No.”

“What?”

“Ida No.”

“You refuse to tell me your name?”

“I did. Ida No.”

“That’s a felony ma’am. Refusing to tell me your name.”

“What?”



Leave a Reply