Facts About Alcohol

Okay, the response was so great from my marijuana article of a few weeks back, with outraged pot users claiming that I was unfairly attacking their favorite drug, that I have to do a piece about alcohol.

If you missed that earlier column, I said booze (taken responsibly) should be legal, but not pot, because people who take marijuana are physically weak and tend to be subversive types. The column brought a flurry of protests from loyal pot smokers.

Fact about alcohol. Booze is more the American way. In the old days, you sidled through the saloon door and plunked your golden double eagle down on the bar. You were poured a shot. You did this out in the open, in front of the bartender and the patrons, like a man.

You didn’t sneak into a dark corner like a skulking wretch and take out a bag filled with grass clippings.

I’m sorry, but I’m against any drug where the normal response after you inhale it, is to roll your eyes and exclaim, “wow man!”

You crazies out there are going to try and twist my words, and have me saying that alcohol doesn’t destroy lives. It does. Hundreds are killed by drunk drivers each year (part of the problem is there’s just too many people driving).

The argument over which is the most physically damaging, liquor or marijuana, is pointless, because each drug can negatively impact your body in different ways.

The simple fact about alcohol, is that a light amount, taken responsibly, is better for your health than if you don’t drink at all. Winemakers know this, but federal drug enforcement officials for some reason don’t want you to.

There is no second-hand smoke with liquor.

Liquor is Biblical. Wine was part of the services from the earliest days of the church. You don’t see the priest lighting up a joint for somebody kneeling at the front-row pew, and then placing a biscuit in his mouth.

“Wow man!”

I also don’t want a drug legalized that has the same slang name as a certain part of the male anatomy (joint). The thought of touching a match to it makes me cringe. That’s bad luck right there. 

Human beings, imperfect as we are, need a little sinning, a little catnip, to make life endurable. The question is, how much? Pot smokers tend to be liberals. They believe that since liquor is legal, pot should also be, and everything else. Say yes to everything.

I contend that one vice (liquor) is enough, not two.

I’m not against doctor-prescribed pot for dealing with the pain of a terminal illness.

The bottom line difference between liquor and marijuana is that booze can be taken in a social setting, a restaurant, for its relaxing impact and as a compliment to food (good food and wine are one of the joys of life).

Marijuana, despite the endless denials from adherents, is principally taken for its hallucinatory effects.

Thus, after all the detailed moral and scientific arguments are made, we can clearly see that pot is a more “chicken” drug than liquor. Just a little, fact about alcohol.

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