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2003 Column Archives Last Updated: Apr 22nd, 2006 - 16:33:07


Sledgehammer
By John Sammon
Feb 1, 2003

columnist sammon

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George!

Mr. Bush!

I know you’re a big-shot, and get paid 400 grand a year, and ride around in a limousine, and your advisors and so-called experts have big titles and even bigger ideas of themselves……..and I’m just an average nobody.

But I think you’re wrong regarding Iraq.

We should change tactics.

There’s a historical parallel. Let me explain, George.

There was this tribe of Indians called Apaches, led by Geronimo (his original name meant One Who Yawns), who fiercely resisted the federal government. The Apache warriors were will-of-the-wisp, could disappear in a second and reappear somewhere else, could live off the land, run 40 miles over rough terrain with no water, were cunning and crafty………..kind of like the terrorists of today.

There were never more than 150 Apache combatants, probably about the same as the number of al-Qaida terrorists (I’m not talking about their stooges, support people or those sympathetic to them, but the heavy players with the grenades strapped to their backs).

The government got a huge army 12,000 strong after the Apaches with mules hauling equipment (no smart weapons back then), folded tents, banging cooking pots hanging from saddles, hardtack biscuits in boxes, water barrels, you name it.

You could hear the fools miles away.

After months of stumbling around at a cost of millions of dollars, the government had caught or killed very few Apaches (a few innocent Indians were killed).

Finally, a bright guy named Al Seiber got smart. He adopted the Apaches’ tactics, used Apache scouts to track their own countrymen, and developed fast-moving strike teams.

It worked.

Mr. Bush. You hope that by chopping the head off the snake (getting rid of Saddam), the snake (terrorism) will die.

It won’t.

The allusive terrorists will simply disperse like the Apaches used to, vanish, and set up shop in a branch office in Syria, a country with which we have normal relations. They’ll be back in business.

In the interim, you’re going to use overwhelming force, a sledgehammer to swat a fly, blunder around Iraq, bomb and kill people in the street like the shoe cobbler whose only crime is he happens to be in the wrong place at the wrong time (the military always act like all problems will be solved after the war). 

You’ll also alienate much of the world, and insure that American troops have to occupy every street corner in Baghdad for 20 years (if we don’t, the puppet ruler we set up will likely be killed).

You’re going to make martyrs.

At a cost in millions.

How about instead, we set up our own small anti-terrorist combat cells and staff them with Arabs. Promise ‘em palatial homes in Beverly Hills in recognition of their services, plus shopping coupons at Albertson’s.

 

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2003 Column Archives
Columns at a Glance
I Insist
I'm Not Scrooge
Don't Smell the Flowers
Driving
Not Me
The End of Substance
Caligulas Horse
Too Much
Wing and a Prayer
Luck Into One
Accept My Dog
War
Simple Candidacy
Pajamas
Can't Admit
Nervous Habits
American People to Fear
Wrong When Right
Media Circus
No Respect
Understanding
Fear and Loathing
Ana Pro
Run
NASA
My Car
Sledgehammer
Un-Rael
Butt Not Bad
Bush Iraq Only Policy
Bush & Lott