The SammonShop | Blue Eagle | Web Columnist | Published .com | Freezerbox .com

Front Page 
 
 This Weeks Column
 
 2006 Column Archives
 
 2005 Column Archives
 
 2004 Column Archives
 
 2003 Column Archives
 
 2002 Column Archives
 
 2001 Column Archives
 
 Talk Back Forum
 
 My Books
 
 Column Links
 
 In Other News
 
 Guest Columnists
 
 Featured Column
 
 The Sammon Shop
 
Search


2004 Column Archives Last Updated: Apr 22nd, 2006 - 16:33:07


Pro and Cons of Astro Projection
By John Sammon
Jan 25, 2004

columnist sammon

Email this article
 Printer friendly page

Astro projection is the science of separating your body into two parts, the astro body, from the physical body. This is cool. Proponents claim that your body has seven energy sources called “chakas,” located at the spine, spleen, naval, heart, throat, head and crown. These release what is called “kunoulini force,” the power to develop para-normal qualities. In other words, using this method, you can separate your astro body from your physical body, and the astro body can then travel to other places, rooms, buildings, even planets.

When the astro body returns, it brings everything with it learned or remembered---back to your physical body.

To achieve this out-of-body state requires concentration and discipline including deep breathing and stretching. Achieving out-of-body mastery is dependant on the proper warm-up, for example, breathing deeply, rolling your eyes like they’re coming out of their sockets, while flailing your arms around and around. If that doesn’t work, be advised that I recently discovered a few shortcuts.

  1. Stand on your head in a corner and put your big toe in your mouth. If you can’t reach your big toe, use somebody else’s. Now, hit yourself in the head with a wooden mallet. Talk about interplanetary travel. You’ll see stars. This method can also be used to search for missing weapons of mass destruction in Iraq.
  1. Or the second method. Avoid going to the bathroom for three days. At the end of this term, you’ll be literally ripping your flesh to depart from your body.

Like anything, there are pros and cons to astro projection. What if your astro body doesn’t like the physical side of you and refuses to come back? Remember, it can fly a lot faster than you can run. And even if you catch up to it, can you force it back inside you?

These potential problems have never been officially studied.

A pro would be the ability to send your astro body on a mission to spy on your girl friend to make sure she’s not dating some other dude, and then report back to you. But what if your astro body requires payment for such services? A con.

There is also a potential jealousy factor, a con. You could become resentful of your astro body because of its ability to come and go wherever it pleases-----while you’re stuck on this lousy earth as slow as a turtle. What if you decide to beat up your asto body? (Remember it can come down on you from a great height).

How would such an assault crime be handled in court? Would you appear in the dock next to your astro body?

Just flying around isn’t so much after all. But what if you could make your astro body take out the garbage? That’s a pro. If your astro body makes you take it out? A con.

Be Heard! Voice your opinion on this article!
Visit the "Talk Back Forum" and post your comment.

Need great content for your web site?
Display this or other SammonSays columns on your webpage for FREE. Just Click Here!

  © Copyright 2004 by SammonSays.com


Top of Page

2004 Column Archives
Columns at a Glance
Poker Dreck
Naive Boytoy
Impotence Pros and Cons
Little Things
Adios Thanksgiving
Election Pro and Cons
Waste Words
Pros and Cons of a Hermaphrodite
God Save the Queen
Pros and Cons of Hip Hop
Pros and Cons of String Theory
Golden Gate Gripes
Governor Muscles In
Love to Hate
Blonde Mechanics
Solitude and Cell Phones
Start With the Top
The Fourth of What?
Finding Fish Tank Profits
Pros and Cons of Brain Fingerprinting
Contesting Wills
Harsh Words
B's of Baghdad
Flow Chart
Pros and Cons of a Woman President
Clothes Horse
Where
African American Not
Clutter House
Stupor Bowl
Pro and Cons of Dinosaur Flatulence
Pro and Cons of Astro Projection
Pro and Cons of Genetic Engineering
He's A Crock