2004 Column Archives
B's of Baghdad
By John Sammon
May 10, 2004, 14:24

I thought the Three Stooges were dead.

George, you’ve done it again.

The ineptitude trio of Bush, Cheney and Rumsfeld are snatching defeat from the jaws of victory.

Our troops turned a Baghdad prison into a San Francisco leather bar. How better to demonstrate to Arabs who are rather puritanical-----our own soft brand of corruption.

Oh, I know. The two excuses the right wing of the Republican Party now making the rounds.

1. Well, Saddam did it too.
2. In war, bad things are bound to happen.

Honest. I’ve never seen imbecility more consistently applied than this group of morons. This one is even better than when that chick soldier ripped the Shiite flag down in front of an Iraqi crowd.

How better to inflame world reaction. Show a babe with a dog leash on a naked Iraqi.

You jokers just made one mistake. (I say this sarcastically) You…let…’em…see…you…do…it! Don’t take pictures as souvenirs, keepsakes for the fireplace mantle back home.

Beat me! Whip me! Tie me up! Gag me with a spoon! Force me to convert to Catholicism! Hit me with a cross.

I’m only in favor of torture among consenting adults.

Women American brutal guards. Bitch guards of Baghdad.

Well George. You did keep one election promise. Early on you promised to include women in any new administration.

Feminists can also be justifiably proud. What an achievement. For the first time in American history, women have participated in a war atrocity.

What ever happened to the friendly World War Two G.I. with the candy bar and lady’s hosiery?

George tells three major lies each week and the Republicans agree. If he said up was down--------they’d nod their heads.

For example, just before testifying at the 9-11 Commission, Bush remarked, “If we (Cheney and I) had anything to hide, we wouldn’t be here.”

This from a man who fought the formation of the 9-11 Commission, fought having to appear, fought the length of time he’d give testimony (Bush wanted 30 seconds), and had to be literally dragged kicking and screaming to the ceremony.

His boss Dick Cheney accompanied him.

What can we do next in Iraq? I know.

Find the holiest shrine we can and spray it with graffiti, teach ‘em about the superiority of American culture. Better yet, rip the shrine off and ship it to Las Vegas, and reinstall it in front of Caesar’s Palace Hotel.

Or, we can force Iraqi prisoners to watch re-runs of the Survivor TV Show.